Mothering Cassidy

She's really going to donate all the beautiful long hair!

Today was an interesting day with Cassidy. She has a talent for making a majority of my days interesting. Lately she hasn't been interested in getting to school on time. This is unique to just Cassi so far. Jace and Emma would rather die first than be late to school. Well, mostly Emma - Jace isn't that dramatic. Cassi doesn't really care. She doesn't really care what people think in general. I'm ecstatic about it, really. I hope that she maintains her independent thinking forever because she will forever know who she is and not be swayed off the path by anyone. That's a great attribute to have. That is - if we can teach her (or convince her) to get on the path following the Savior.

So, with Grandma Connie's help, we figured out Cassi would like to wake up herself and be in charge of when to get ready in the morning. So, Sunday night we set up the alarm clock and figured out how long it would take her to get ready. Then she decided when to get up the next morning. At 7:45 am the next morning, the alarm went off and she jumped out of bed and ran to the kitchen to get breakfast. She was determined to get everything done faster than planned so she could "do anything she wants" before it was time to leave for school. Needless to say I was very excited! One less stress in the morning, right?! Well, today didn't go too well.

She came into our bed in the night because she was dreaming about "bloody Mary". Some kind child in school told Cassidy that Bloody Mary waits for kids in the bathroom to kill them. She was convinced and there was nothing I could say to convince her he was fibbing her. (I told you we need to get her on the right path early.) So, for two or three days she would wait forever to go to the bathroom because she was afraid of Bloody Mary. That is not a great idea for a small girl. One day she just decided to it would be more convenient to believe me - I guess - because Bloody Mary disappeared. When she finally woke up this morning, she said "Bloody Mary does really kill you." and I thought "Oh great! Here we go again." But then she said, "it's because she's a joke - you know - you 'kill' me. Get it Mom?" But the dream was still scary enough to bring her into our bed. There should be a rule somewhere for teachers: Don't let your students talk about Bloody Mary.

So, because she was in our bed and didn't "hear" the alarm (though Jace can hear it and he sleeps downstairs), she didn't wake up. When she finally did wake up, she wasn't moving very fast. In the past, I've tried to bug her all morning to get ready. I've tried yelling (unfortunately I'm pretty good at that one). I've tried being a super-happy-cheerleader type mom, talking about all the great things that will happen that day at school. This much I do know - threats don't really work with her. Or, maybe I just don't know which buttons are good ones for her. Threats usually make her more determined to do what was already in her head.

Today, I tried what worked yesterday. I just told her how much time she had and what she needed to do before she left for school. And she told me she wasn't going to school. Remember, threats don't work. So, you could say "oh yes, you are going to school", but you can guess how well that would work. She really is a thinker and likes to have philosophical discussions. I sat down on the floor with her in her room. (I'm not sure I found any floor. I mostly tried to avoid sitting on sharp things.) We talked about why Daddy has to go to work even though he'd rather stay at home and play with his kids. She decided that he loves us very much and doesn't want us to live on the street. (Actually, she said we could move in with Judy Hooper, so I had to tell her the street part - it sounds a little scarier, I guess.) So why does a child need to go to school everyday? If anyone has a really good, not pretty words to convince a small child, answer to that question - it might help Cassidy decide to go everyday. One great thing came out of all this - the girls' room is really clean!

So far tonight, she's going to school tomorrow. I'm really trying not to take this all so seriously. She'll grow out of it - at least a little bit - and we'll talk about this over dinner at work Christmas parties and laugh because everyone has at least one child like this.